8018/20959
I hope that when I die, I am principally remembered for twatting a bloke who chucked an egg at me.
Hasn't happened yet, but if anyone feels like chucking an egg at me and doesn't mind being twatted in return then go for it. Make sure there's someone filming it though. Let the games commence.
And being remembered for twatting a bloke who chucked an egg at you is better than not being remembered at all. And in many ways better than being remembered for a lot of the crap that people get remembered for.
Proof that snow is sent by some evil force to excite children and then hurt them. Jeffrey was still standing, if a little bit of a shadow of his former self. An animal (or human) had taken his carrot nose in the night. Phoebe wanted to see how well attached his head was so pulled on it and it came off and hit her in the chin (she is her father's daughter) and made her bleed. Sometimes the snow will bide its time, but it will always cause you pain.
I am keen to do the 100th episode of Twitch of Fun at some point, but some of the puppets have gone missing. I've for nearly all of them, but Cocky Carrot and the Birthday Donkey (as well as that rotten carrot - I've already forgotten what half of the characters are called or what voices they had and I am buggered if I am going back to watch the videos to check). I thought I'd put all the puppets in the same box, but clearly those ones went into a different container and I don't know where it is. Can I do ep 100 without the donkey and the carrot? It doesn't bear thinking about.
I was up at the old house so I had a look for them, but they weren't in any of the places I expected and so are probably in a box somewhere in the new house. Or birthday donkey escaped and finally got his wish to be dispatched to oblivion.
Is it a coincidence that the snowman’s nose and the phallic carrot have disappeared at the same time? Is it some carroty version of the Great Escape?
I have kept up the latest healthy eating plan for 5 days now and my personal training session went pretty well. I felt like Gwyneth Paltrow looks to Shallow Hal, but when I looked in the mirror I looked like Gwyneth Paltrow in an offensive fat suit. Which would be fine because it's what you're like inside that counts. But I am horrible inside.
I only care about being healthy, not what I look like (I would have thought I'd made that obvious by walking around Hitchin looking like I don't have a home) so it's only annoying that I have to lose all the weight again, before putting it on and then losing it. The only positive is that as long as I die of a protracted illness rather than being hit by a bus I will finally be thin when I am dead. And even if I am chubby at death, then I should soon lose the weight after that and be skellington thin (or maybe just fit inside a little pot).
Immediately after finishing the session I set off for the
177th Chapter of Stone Clearing. The Stocean was damper than I expected and the stones were not in the grip of its icy unyielding vulva. You can hear my escapades here, please support my sponsor.
