Warming Up

I am greatly enjoying my morning and evening walks with the dog. There was no point in stone-clearing this morning as the fields had a light covering of snow and I refuse to countenance the modern stone clearing technique of taking a blow torch, so I went up the hill to the local church (actually in the next village) passing through snow-coated Hertfordshire, exercising, whilst breathing relatively fresh air and enjoying the majesty of nature. I don’t mind the cold or the rain or the snow - there’s something so joy-making about starting your day this way. And then returning to see my little village nestled in the valley. It has not taken very long for this to feel like home. 

At night, as the electric lights twinkle in the darkness I always feel that this must be exactly what the little town of Bethlehem looked like back on 25th December 0BC. Especially with the snow everywhere. 

Though it’s not all fairy-tale ideas of mythical events here. Someone has stolen all the wheels off a car that was parked in the car park of the doctor’s surgery. Presumably over night, though that still takes some balls as it’s in the centre of the village and surrounded by houses. It must have taken some time and effort (they seem to have jacked it up by placing it on some huge stones - it’s awful to see my benign wise friends being used as the unwitting accomplices in a crime) and presumably involved a team of people. I don’t know what you’d get for a car wheel on the black market, but factoring in the high risk nature of this crime, it seems like small returns for what (including travel, assuming they aren’t local) must have used up a good three hours of their night time. 

It’s impressive that they (literally) pulled it off, just as it is terrifying for everyone and horrendous for the person who’s car it is.

I grew up in a village of course, so don’t have rose-tinted glasses regarding such issues. And as wonderful as walking through woods and countryside alone is, there’s an element of danger to it, that is slightly abated by having a huge fierce-looking dog with me. I don’t know if Wolfie would step up if I was in trouble or just lick an assailant to death, but I think she’d put most people off miserying me. Also my lack of commercial success is a help with that too. 

At night of course I have to contend with the ghosts, who are not afraid of Wolfie, but I am less concerned about them than the unpicked up turds that line the path. 

Two fun walks and over 600 calories burned up in the process. I am hoping that thin Rich might be at the helm for the next series of RHLSTP, if not right at the start, then hopefully by the final show on April 1st. I have set myself the ambitious goal of fitting back into my 2014 suits before the series is over. Let’s see if that happens.

A really excellent RHLSTP with possibly the nicest man in showbiz Sanjeev Bhaskar is now up on audio here - 

And on video (with special guest appearance in the intro - I have essenitally performed in a sketch with The Goodies and could not be more delighted) here