We had a traditional Thai massage this evening and no, we didn't go to Happy Ending Massage Parlour. Why would we? Who wants to know the ending before you've even begun? Would it be happy or sad or more likely would we be in slight discomfort from being pummelled by a small Thai lady (and not in a good way)? I kind of hoped that there would be no happy ending as my girlfriend was lying on a mat about three feet away from me and she probably would have seen, but still the chance of being caught is what makes most of this stuff enjoyable anyway right?
As it turned out we had differing responses to the massage. My girlfriend wasn't that keen but I thought it was amazing, much better than any massage I've had before (including the one where the man put hot and cold stones on me and then surreptitiously touched my cock). To be honest I've rarely seen the point of massages and find them a bit weird and embarrassing, but try to use the time to drift off and think about other stuff, when I am not wondering if it's all leading up to a happy ending. But this one seemed to actually achieve something and made me feel energised and alert (though at the time it was quite relaxing, even when my muscles were being attacked and hurt). It was quite vigourous, but that's what my aching and tense back and legs probably need and though there were some holds that might have gone down better in a wrestling ring I liked it. I had barely had a chance to say hello to the masseuse before I was lying face down with her climbing on top of me and I realised that if this all stopped at this point and then I was asked to pick her out of a line up I would not be able to do so - not because I am racist (or only partly because of that) but because I had not had a chance to see the person who was doing this to me. I didn't know if she was old or young. She hadn't even bought me a drink. She placed her hand on my thigh at one point and I couldn't work out if the heart beat I was feeling was mine or hers. That's an oddly intimate place to get to with a stranger, though in a metaphysical rather than physical sense.
I also liked the fact that we'd put on Thai trousers and shirts to have the massage. I was kind of hoping we could keep them so I could wear them around the house and pretend to be wise. But I will have to content myself with keeping the tiny see through white pants that I was given at last week's massage, which I have been enjoying wearing subsequently, pretending that my girlfriend would find them sexy. And not beacuse I think it is sexy to wear a little string goolie bag.
The 90 minutes passed by very fast, and afterwards I felt like a superman - my usually aching back felt strong and painless. I jogged up the steep hill to our room. My girlfriend looked a bit miffed and said she hadn't enjoyed the pain aspect. I decided to cheer her up by wearing my little girly pants under my jeans tonight. She would know they were there. It would be hot for her to think of it. Fellas if you want to turn a lady on let her know you're wearing some tiny massage pants. They love it.
I think maybe I will try to find someone in the UK who can pummel me like this on a regular basis. Maybe Happy Ending Massage parlour is just a regular Thai massage place and you feel happy at the end because the pain has stopped. Better to spend 90 minutes in pain to appreciate how relatively pleasant your life is than having 90 minutes of pleasure and returning to your humdrum life.
