If I want to have a baby before I am 40 then I really have to get a shift on. There are a little over nine and a half months to go until July 12th 2007 and the gestation period of the human being will eat up nine months of that, so I have around about three weeks to find the woman of my dreams, convince her that I am the man of her dreams and then impregnate her. Alternatively I could just have unprotected sex with the first woman I meet and hope for the best.
There is still a window of opportunity, but Father Time is pulling that window shut and there's just a tiny space left for me to shoot my payload through if I want to know the joys of fatherhood before I reach the 40 year milestone.
It's probably not that important a landmark to deliberately rush things through, but psychologically it's quite a thought to realise that I will enter my fifth decade with no progeny. At the age of 40 some people are becoming grandparents and I haven't even produced the conduit who will lead me to that glorious state (and I would always only see my children as a conduit to grandchildren, which is all I really want).
It's also strange to think that if ever one of my lazy fellas ever does make it through then I will be over forty years older than my kids. In my sixties as they enter their twenties. In my hundreds as they enter their sixties. In my a hundred and forties when they celebrate their own hundredth birthdays.
So all I am saying is it would be nice if I can get someone up the duff in the next three weeks, then when my child is 20, I will still be in my fifties and won't feel like a square old man dad. So if you are attractive, fertile and not mental (also preference will be given to females in this application) and want to be impregnated by me immediately, then do get in touch. And remember if you're up for this do consider carefully whether agreeing to be inseminated (unartificially by the way) by a stranger who is only doing it so he will be 59 on his child's 20th birthday doesn't automatically make you mental and thus unable to take part in thisn offer.
Also you have to be really good with kids as you'll be the one bringing them up and be independently wealthy as I really need all my money for internet poker and dating girls.
Do get in touch.
